The foundation of any relationship is not just love, but trust. So when you find out that your partner is lying to you, it almost feels like your whole world is falling apart.
However, how do you determine if your partner is lying to you? Instead of snooping around their belongings and playing detective, there is one trick that you use to spot the lies. Moreover, all it takes are a pair of sharp eyes and your partner’s face!
Be Familiar Of Their Baseline Behavior
Baseline behavior is “…the total nonverbal attributes absent of stressors and triggers,” says Roger Strecker, Sr., a behavioral analysis interviewer. In layman’s terms, baseline behavior is the usual and normal behavior of one person. Each person has a unique baseline behavior.
It is quite easy to determine the baseline behavior of your partner. After all, you spend most of your time with your partner, if not every day. By recognizing your partner’s baseline, you will be able to see through behaviors that are deviant from the norm. And in turn, it will be a lot easier to see if your partner is lying or not.
Look Into Their Eyes
As the saying goes, the eyes are the windows of the soul. If your partner is lying, they will exhibit unique eye behavior. Knowing these behaviors will make it easier for you to see through the lies of your partner. According to Wendy L. Patrick, Ph.D.,“if you are using visual behavior to gauge the credibility of someone you know, you will also have the benefit of a baseline. Some people, for example, will never look you in the eye.”
One of the most common eye behavior of liars is their tendency for their eyes to go back and forth. According to Mark Bouton, a long-serving FBI agent, darting eyes are a physiological reaction to the feeling of being trapped. This behavior is commonly found in people who are seeking to escape from a dangerous situation.
Another common eye behavior of liars is rapid blinking. By definition, rapid blinking is when a person blinks five to six times per minute. This behavior is a manifestation of stress that a person who lies often feels. However, the rapidness of blinking is affected by medical conditions like Parkinson’s disease and schizophrenia.
Watch Out For Microexpressions
Microexpressions are glimpses of the “true emotion” of the liar. It is like a crack that breaks into the facade of the liar, allowing people to see the real truth. Leanne ten Brinke, Ph.D. says that “When you see a facial expression like this, you’ve got to probe with questions to find out why the person is feeling this way.” Microexpressions only last for one-fifth to one-25th of a second, which makes it difficult to spot these rare flashes.
Most of the time, these microexpressions reveal feelings that the liar wants to hide, like guilt and contempt. If you detect any of these microexpressions on your partner’s face, there is an extreme need for you two to communicate. Microexpressions are impossible to fake, so seeing these on your partner’s face is a serious concern.
Research published in Psychological Science has shown that humans are good at seeing through lies. Bella DePaulo,Ph.D. and colloborator. said that “liars’ answers sound more discrepant and ambivalent, the structure of theirstories is less logical, and their stories sound less plausible.” So if your gut feeling is telling you that there’s something wrong with your partner’s dialogue, you might be right. Remember these lie-detecting tips; When your hunch tells you that your partner is lying, you can confirm it with your very eyes.